Dear American Woman,

I have heard many times in the past that I'm arrogant, controlling, and critical. These insightful evaluations of my personality come from people who do things that are waaaay beyond my personal boundaries. Hence the criticism.

I'm older now, and have been studying uhhmerican shallowness since I was a young boy. I've got some salt in me, and my experience hasn't just been at face value, I've been digging philosophically and analyzing YOU for over 30 years.

I truly respect your individual rights, needs, and desires. No matter who you are. But, if you do certain things, I'm going to see that you're selfish, inconsiderate, reckless, and fake. If I yell at you for doing/saying certain things, I ASKED YOU POLITELY THE FIRST COUPLE TIMES but somehow you remain... the un-teachable, shallow, selfish ummerican woman. These qualities SUCK at any age. I don't care what anyone thinks about my tendency to date younger than my age. Willingness to learn, respect, and ethical compassion and patience are sexy on a woman of any age. Too bad so many of you say "yes" to self development and then go right back to imprinting your mind with alcohol and TV. Am I arrogant because I'm overly critical of crappy normal people that smile pretty at first and try to seem nice? Nope. That's just me calling you out for being an asshole. If I am taking your personal inventory in a mean way, it's because you've had many warnings not to piss me off. I always do it this way... Imply, ask politely, heart to heart, then stern recommendation, then flatly stating my problem, then ultimatums, then YELLING. If I get to the end of this process with you, it's because part of me wants you to LEAVE ME ALONE, part of me really thinks you are that nice person I met in the beginning, and part of me still wants to be physical with you.

To the women that have enormous emotional requirements, but can't say what exactly they want from a man.... Please go bother someone else with your bottomless pit of need, and work on your list of WHAT IT IS THAT YOU WANT SPECIFICALLY so you're not always crying and bugging your man for NOTHING IN PARTICULAR.

To the women that demand 100 percent from a man, but are only giving 90 percent because they're saving some secret little piece of their hearts for IMAGINARY PRINCE CHARMING.... you're hurting yourself and your man, and you're trapped in a hell without knowing it. I pity you, but not if you fooled me at the beginning and made me think you were a gentle person of substance. If that's the case, I'm disgusted by you. Fuckin 90 percent-ers. Thanks ummerican christian society for programming our daughters to behave this way... Thanks women for being suckers for the man's programming... how can you feel about yourselves?

To the women that are unsafe with their bodies... HOW IGNORANT ARE YOU? It only takes a few easy steps to keep your inside and outside free of bacteria, viruses, and toxic chemicals sold to you by the man. I am a fucking NINJA about health, and am very public about this. If you're talking to me in any sort of intimate way, YOU HAVE ALREADY HEARD ALL THIS and must heed my words or go away. If you rub yourself all over doorknobs, trash cans, and other people that are doing the same thing, don't expect me to feel safe touching you. Americans are all IGNORANT GERM COOKERS, programmed to be this way by the bomb and pharmaceutical companies that own the media. I am here to teach you about this. If you think I'm arrogant, it's because my urgency about this topic SUPERCEDES YOUR LAZINESS AND COMPLACENCY. I'm not arrogant, you're lazy and scared to take advice from a confident man. Ninjas must be ever vigilant about ALL forms of attack, including biological. I can get you up to speed on controlling the germs in your life in a day or two, with almost no money or effort on your part. If this doesn't sound good to you, you're complacent and reckless. In which case I don't need to date you, chase you, or even talk to you. I'm not a germ freak, I'm a germ KILLER. If you aren't down to take a couple basic, easy steps to control germs, how can I let you touch my face... kiss me... etc...

To the women that are un-teachable... To the women that hear my words, say 'ok,' and then behave like it was never said... You're gonna hear me yelling at you eventually. I WANT YOU TO LISTEN, AND APPLY WHAT YOU'VE HEARD TO YOUR BEHAVIOR IN REAL TIME, IN A WAY THAT I CAN SEE YOU'RE MAKING AN EFFORT AT LEAST. If you hear my words and don't heed... I WANT YOU TO GO AWAY OR CHANGE, THAT'S WHY I'M BEING MEAN. Somehow, many women think there is SOME 3RD ALTERNATIVE OR CHOICE HERE... Nope. When I am reduced to yelling at you because you've offended my ethics multiple times, there's no more room for negotiation. Make an effort to start changing, or GO AWAY. Those are your only options at that point. There will be no more pretty smile stringing me along until the next time you let me down.

To the women that are un-teachable... To the women that hear my words, say 'ok,' and then behave like it was never said... You're gonna hear me yelling at you eventually. I WANT YOU TO LISTEN, AND APPLY WHAT YOU'VE HEARD TO YOUR BEHAVIOR IN REAL TIME, IN A WAY THAT I CAN SEE YOU'RE MAKING AN EFFORT AT LEAST. If you hear my words and don't heed... I WANT YOU TO GO AWAY OR CHANGE, THAT'S WHY I'M BEING MEAN. Somehow, many women think there is SOME 3RD ALTERNATIVE OR CHOICE HERE... Nope. When I am reduced to yelling at you because you've offended my ethics multiple times, there's no more room for negotiation. Make an effort to start changing, or GO AWAY. Those are your only options at that point. There will be no more pretty smile stringing me along until the next time you let me down.

Notice me sayin it twice? If you're like the selfish and dense people that have offended me in recent years, you probably didn't notice. TAKE MY WORDS SERIOUSLY - THE FIRST TIME - AND SAVE YOURSELF THE TEARS THAT COME WHEN I LOSE PATIENCE WITH YOUR LACK OF RESPECT.

About a woman's needs... I can stroke your body and mind to great heights of pleasure. (ninja sex haha) I will try this out with you for a while to see if we like each other's style. If I'm complaining about your actions but I'm still sleeping with you, you're at the tail end of a relationship you can potentially save... MAKE AN EFFORT TO HEED MY WORDS AND CHANGE YOUR BEHAVIOR IN REAL TIME, OR GO AWAY...

I'm not arrogant. I have a very detailed knowledge of myself, and you. I won't tolerate your lies, shallowness, disrespect or scary habits.

I'm really really gentle... if I think you care, and are making an effort. If I'm not gentle with you, it's because you've shown me you aren't into changing your behavior and habits but YOU'RE STILL AROUND BUGGING ME FOR SOMETHING. Just leave a man alone if you aren't into honoring his boundaries and ethics. By honoring, I mean STOP SAYING THOSE CRAPPY THINGS. STOP BEING SELFISH AND SHALLOW, AND BE CONCERNED WITH HOW A MAN'S FEELINGS CAN BE HURT... IN REAL TIME MOMENT-TO-MOMENT APPLICATION. I don't want a 'YES, OK'... I want the crappy behavior and habits to disappear.

When you say and do crappy things, while still trying to maintain a hold on me... expect to feel my anger and be hurt by it.

I'm supposed to be compassionate right? ENFORCING MY ETHICS IN REAL TIME is part of my compassionate path actually. I don't follow YOU around, it's you that follows ME around. Honor my ethics at all times, be gentle, considerate, and respectful in word, thought and deed, when I'm with you and when I'm not... or BEGONE.